Time Ranger (retired)

Right off the bat, check your holsters and ammo. We’re going to capture Buffalo Tom for perpetrating one of the biggest train robberies in American history.

Oof and foof. Hope all of you have the smoke coughed out of your lungs by now. Prayers, hugs, whatever it takes, for all of you who lost more than treasure during last week’s fires.

I’m guessing summer is ignoring our insistent coughing noises and is taking its jolly old good time leaving the house and getting on a flight to annoy some other relative.

Not counting volcanic eruptions, tidal waves or dinosaurs crawling out of Earth’s steaming crevices in a biblical prediction, there’s not really a bad day to ride a horse. It’s fall. Finally. Beautiful day to climb aboard the saddle, wiggle in, laugh and chat with friends and neighbors.

Back on Oct. 8, 1858, the first Butterfield Overland stagecoach rode through Newhall, Saugus and San Francisquito Canyon. They were greeted in Newhall by a 100-gun salute by the local cowboys and yahoos. When applying for work, do note that “Yahoo” always looks good on a resume…

Many of us falsely learned that the first major gold strike in California was up north in Sutter’s Mill in 1849. On Oct. 1, 1842, The New York Observer newspaper noted that a major gold discovery just happened in our very own Placerita Canyon.

Offering a beautiful post-full moon howdy to you, saddlepals. And happy autumn while we’re at it. Took its darn time getting here. Before you know it, it’ll be sweater weather, although, come to think of it, I’ve never seen anyone in the saddle on a trail ride wearing a sweater. Hope I don’t, either.

Dear riparian friends, neighbors and saddlepals. Tip of the terribly expensive O’Farrell and welcome to another trek through the vortex of Santa Clarita past.

Hey. Is that all y’all moping sheepishly about, pre-coffee Sunday morn? C’mon. Hop up in those saddles. You sage riders who know their way around a horse can just wiggle a boot into the stirrup and swing a leg over the saddle without spilling a drop of latte.

How in Heaven’s Name did it get to be September? Wasn’t it just January 20 minutes ago? Fall feels just around the corner.

A humble padre up the coast at Mission Santa Buenaventura made a historic decision back on Sept. 3, 1795. The Catholic Church was down to two sites to build their newest mission — either in San Fernando or Santa Clarita. Father Vincent de Santa Maria made the call and we lost.

Tipping my terribly expensive but utilitarian O’Farrell hat toward the direction of you ladies and offering a positive “Howdy” to the menfolk. What say we all climb aboard the thousands of ponies I’ve brought?

Well a happy Sunday in August to you, dear saddlepals. Hope you survived Saturday night and still possess your car keys, spouse, loved one and most of your brain cells from the carousing.

It’s not entirely too bad for a late July in Santa Clarita. C’mon. Hop up on one of the noble steeds that I’ve talked into giving you a ride. Bring a slicker because we’ve got some monumental summer rainstorms to inspect.