This October marks 25 years since we first moved to the United States and
I’ve been reminiscing about those early days, and two distinct memories are stuck in my mind. They stand out as key differences between the U.K. and the USA, but more importantly, I think they speak to the heartbeat of all who identify as “American,” especially in how we work because of how we live.
- “Mrs. Butler, may I have a yogurt please?”
Next door lived a wonderful family: David and Nanette, along with their four then-young children, Kaitlin, Megan, Austin and Michael. We knew we’d be fast friends when, after just three days of being neighbors, Michael — perhaps 7 years old at the time — was found standing in just his board shorts and bare feet with his head in our refrigerator. Seeing exactly what his little heart desired, he called out to my wife, “Mrs. Butler, may I have a yogurt, please?”
Three thoughts immediately crossed my mind:
- That’s our refrigerator!
- Why doesn’t he have a shirt and shoes on?
- But … these American kids are so polite, referring to my wife as “Mrs.” and adding the word “please” to what I thought was a rather brash request.
Twenty-five years later, I have come to love the directness of Americans, especially in the workplace. They — and yet I can say “we” now as a fellow U.S. citizen — see what we want and go after it. The drive to pull oneself up by the bootstraps, climb that mountain, traverse that river, and build something from nothing pumps through the veins of all Americans, young and old.
As Americans, we break with tradition. As a kid, I’d never have sauntered around my neighbor’s house in just my board shorts; it wouldn’t have seemed “right and proper.” But why not? American business ingenuity is driven by those with a wanderlust to shake off the status quo and a comfort with making others uncomfortable.
I find my fellow Americans polite and yet forthright. I have noticed a greater level of mutual respect here — less profanity in the workplace and greater cordiality. Is it perfect? No. But I think deep down in our DNA, as children of the New World, is a true reverence for all people, regardless of age, gender, or race. After all, our first papers tell us: We are all created equal and out of many, (we become) one.
- “Hey, I’m Sara, I’ll be your server!”
Within our first week, we ventured out to our first American restaurant, which I later found out wasn’t the quaint “mom-and-pop” spot we thought, but what the locals call a “chain restaurant.”
As we walked to our seats, I was shocked by the size of the portions — how could one person eat all of that? Then, I learned of the concept of “to-go-boxes.”
Genius! Increase the quantity on the plate so people feel they’re getting value for money, only to take it home, put it in the refrigerator, and throw it away later! What a win-win.
As we were seated at the table, Sara, the server, joined us and asked if she could get us started with some iced tea. It was like a double-punch: Firstly, I’d never had a server sit at my table; and secondly, I was wondering, “Why would anyone ever put ice in tea?”
My business takeaways were: I kind of liked — and have come to love — the casualness of the waiting staff here in the Land of the Free (Refill). As Ritz-Carlton hotels coined the phrase, aren’t we just “ladies and gentlemen serving ladies and gentlemen?” And why not throw ice into tea? What we enjoy tomorrow doesn’t have to be what we’ve consumed in the past; we have the freedom to change our tastes in the present.
In closing, as we soon celebrate 250 years of this Great Experiment, whether it’s the directness of a child at a refrigerator or the casual confidence of a server at your table, the American business spirit thrives by discarding the “right and proper” in favor of the bold, the cordial and the relentlessly innovative.
Paul Butler is a Santa Clarita resident and a client partner with Newleaf Training and Development of Valencia (newleaftd.com). For questions or comments, email Butler at [email protected].
