Former SClarita councilman and mayor Bob Kellar is one darn good friend. Adore the guy. Years ago, I was interviewing The Bobster on my old radio show and set up the first question with apologies, reassurances, throat clearings and preambles. This wasn’t a shameless media “Gotcha!” question.
But, I had to know.
“Who do I see to protect me from you?”
I didn’t mean dear Bob, personally. I meant — Where Do I Go To Protect Myself From Government? Honest guy he is, Kellar confessed. He didn’t know. We spent the rest of the hour talking about how government was getting out of control, in existence more to serve itself than the people and that was a decade-plus ago. It’s worse now.
Do note. In government, at all levels, dwell many decent, hard-toiling souls fighting tireless and often thankless battles. They serve, saint-like, in lives of ordinariness and service. Traffic lights, urinals and drinking fountains work without so much as a “Mother may I?” Faceless people who are on the phone 10 hours a day walk that extra mile to slash through red tape for the elderly or those not adept at speaking the Queen’s English. Have you driven around the SCV lately? Glance at all the profoundly beautiful trees and shrubbery, so tastefully planted, in everything from parks to highway meridians. Headbutts and high-fives to the good people who planned, planted and watered daily. Being a “tree city” will be a gift to our valley for generations. Sincerely? To everyone from cops to clerks, typists to lifeguards, who make our lives a little more frictionless.
But, increasingly, we’ve slipped ever deeper into the morass of war with our own governments. It’s actually a failure of citizenship because the public has become light years beyond lazy, stupid and indifferent.
Is there any bit of common-sense daily government housekeeping — Right, Left or Could Care Less — that doesn’t come with 164 frivolous lawsuits brought by ambulance-chasing jackanapes? Does the government never tire of vomiting out constipational regulations?
Our own Mighty Signal recently issued a fatwah, demanding the recall of Los Angeles County District Attorney George Gascón. To my dismay, nowhere in our proclamation was there fine print about inserting Gascón, flip-flops and out-of-context smile, into a leaf mulcher. I read no proviso about running him through a gauntlet of farm implement-wielding angry citizens down Santa Monica Boulevard from City Hall to the pier, kicking him in the butt every step of the way until he was thrown into the shark-rich Pacific. Not one tepid suggestion to pants him, paint George’s butt cheeks with iodine and FedEx him to San Francisco where such appearances by public officials are de rigueur.
What a damn waste of time last year, that first Gascón recall effort. What a damn waste of money, of energy. Elected chiefly on the dark money of billionaire and foreign sludge George Soros, Gascón has worked daily to destroy civilization at a simple and foundational level.
Free the criminals. Free perverts. Free murderers. Thieves. Arsonists. Child rapists. Let ’em loose. Above all, let’s not hurt their feelings or label them. In 2020, it was Gascón, who, as then-San Francisco D.A., co-authored the controversial Proposition 47. The measure made it a polite but insistent “ahem,” if that, to steal a red-cent shy of $950 worth of merchandise. Of course, math-adept thieves can wander to 10 stores, stealing $9,500 worth of goodies. Our own imbecilic and wicked culture is to blame. We passed Proposition 47 in a 60-to-40 victory. And guess what?
Like wildfire, word spread that it’s open season for shoplifters. Smash-&-Grab is now relegated to Kitty Up A Tree feature on the evening news. Some government apologists point at tweaked statistics, claiming crime is down. That’s a lie. Those who spread it are liars. Crime is not being confronted because why would a halfway smart cop want to risk life and limb stopping felons and insane worse, inviting their own arrest?
Great. There’s another recall effort. I wince that nearly half the citizenry will vote to keep Gascón at his great job of willfully destroying society. Even if this sniveling villain IS recalled, he’ll still collect a fat pension — for destroying the very community he was elected to protect.
I drive around Los Angeles. Years ago, it was a zombie apocalypse movie. It’s worse today. You can look at brazen increases in violence, but the problem is more than statistics. It’s — The Vibe. It’s sitting at a sidewalk café with homeless encampments just feet away. It’s having to walk on the other side of the street because of threatening toughs. It’s watching helplessly as individuals and mobs shove armfuls of loot into plastic bags, strolling out and daring someone to stop them. It’s the eye-wateringly obscene act of Gascón’s office sentencing 26-year-old transgender sex offender Hannah Tubbs to juvenile detention. Tubbs strangled and sexually assaulted a 10-year-old in a restaurant bathroom stall. Tubbs? Slap on the wrist. Won’t need to bother registering as a violent sex offender.
Gascón? Another gift of the Democratic Party.
We’re just not angry enough. Now? We have the government we richly deserve. We’re either going to have to live with this moral and ethical cesspool that is today’s county D.A.’s office and George Gascón, or, we’re going to have to roll up our sleeves and not only punt this thick-ankled woke bum from office, but make sure his wretched tailbone hits every concrete step on the way out.
Take the time to look for places to sign Gascón’s recall petition. Visit RecallDAGeorgeGascon.com. Pass out petitions yourself.
And next time there’s an election, from local Hart High school board to president?
This is a great country, both public and private sector. Don’t blindly hand it over to cancel culture vampires intent on destroying it. Be an adult. Open your eyes. Stop fanning yourselves coquettishly and mew out your victimhood. Do your damn actual homework.
The SCV’s own John Boston is earth’s most prolific humorist and satirist. Visit his bookstore at johnbostonbooks.com.